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But, what you know...can help someone elseI'm on the phone with my aunt the other day and out of the blue she say's "can I ask you a personal question"? Without hesitation I say yes. She asks if I was "head over heals madly in love" when I married my ex-husband and babies daddy? She then asked me if it was difficult for me to leave when it was over? The answer to both questions was the same...absolutely. After a few more probing questions the explanation was reveled. Her granddaughter was supposed to be getting married in January and just found out that her fiancée, live-in love, father of her two small children, was having ANOTHER baby with another woman. This would be the same "other woman" that was carrying his child at the same time that my cousin was having his first baby. I hope that I haven't lost you here. My little second-cousin got pregnant by her then boyfriend and had a baby boy. A month later another young lady (I use the term loosely), had a baby by the same man. My little cousin forgave him, got back together got engaged and they had a second child. The wedding was planned and now there appears to be a second child for the "other" woman on the way. What do you do? Now the reason my aunt was seeking me out is clear. Although she had some similar experiences being a divorced single mom back in the day, she wanted some sound advise and someone closer in age to her grandchild to talk with her and share the emotions that come with leaving a man despite having children with him and that burning heartache that comes with letting go of that dream...of your babies growing up in the same house with both parents. Often we go through things that we don't share because we're embarrassed or ashamed. Not realizing that our stories and experiences could help someone get through what they are going through. So, this is what I told her... The hardest thing I've ever done in my life was the best thing that I could have ever done with my life for the life of my children. It was hard, it was confusing, it was lonely, it was physically and emotionally draining but, most of all it was necessary for me. I told my aunt to give her granddaughter my number and tell her to call me, that I was here to talk, listen or both. Sometimes we just need to know that there are others that have walked a path that we are considering so that we know that it does lead somewhere better than were we are now. Now, I'm asking for all my people men and women to help me and many others that may be going through something of their own. Tell us your story of how you get through or got through a tough decision. Help me reassure a young woman that there are MEN out there that can appreciate a real woman (with children) and not to give up or give in out of fear of the unknown or being left alone. See, I can only speak on what I know first hand, what I would do and what I've done. But, I know that my way is only one way and there are many ways to find happiness and peace. I do know that there are many options and possibilities that she hasn't even considered and yes, in due time I'll even introduce her to this site where she can read your comments and maybe in her own time...look for love and discover choices she had never considered before. This is Leticia, what would you do? Spread The WordIf you like this article and think other people would benefit from reading it, then help spread the word by adding it to one of the following social bookmarking sites. The more people that vote for this article the more people will know it is worth reading!Related Articles |
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