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Apr 15 2007
Dating Someone with Children... Are you ready?
Comments
17th of Apr, 2007
It is important when choosing a partner with children to be seriously committed and be honest to all involved including ones self.Too many people fail in relationships leaving the children alone and feeling abandoned. Do your absolute best in working out problems before turning tail to run. Nice article!
18th of Apr, 2007
Girls must get sex education in grammar school and high school. They must also be taught the emotional, social, and financial CONSEQUENCES of getting pregnant - especially of having a baby when they\'re too young.
They must INSIST that guys use condoms - no matter how much guys resent it. They must carry condoms with them, because many guys don\'t.
They must learn that after a baby is born, MANY YEARS OF HARD WORK, STRESS, AND EXPENSES come next. The \"cute idea of having a baby\" is quickly gone.
If their man leaves soon after the baby is born - like many do - it is MUCH HARDER to attract a new man. It is AMAZING and CONCERNING that many attractive, sweet girls have babies when they\'re young, their men leave, and then they have trouble attracting men again. Especially look at Caribbean black girls and Latin girls - many have babies young, and then they can\'t get husbands after that. They\'re stuck with a baby and the probability of being single for life. DON\'T have babies when you\'re young and single.
19th of Apr, 2007
I will NOT date anyone that cannot accept my child. I was in a relationship with someone and noticed how distance and annoyed he seemed when my daughter was around. I could not kick him to the curb fast enough. While he is sitting outside with his things, my daughter will be in a nice warm home waving BUH-BYE to his behind!
19th of Apr, 2007
Great article, thanks for posting. Nice comments pleasure
20th of Apr, 2007
Good advice all around.
20th of Apr, 2007
Wow...... I don't know where to begin.?!I am 40, single, never married, no children. I don't date men with children, because it is a HUGE responsibility!!- regardless if the guy has custody or not. Single parents MUST think of their children's needs FIRST- not their own. Sorry, but that's one of the many sacrifices you made when you became a parent. I take a lot of criticism from single dads ( because I won't date them ) and the fact of the matter is, I won't because I'm unselfish; I realize that being a stepmother is just as important as being a Mother. The single dads are being selfish, by even considering a woman who is not 110% invested in raising their children as their own.
21st of Apr, 2007
Good article and excellent feedback... my thanks to all.
21st of Apr, 2007
great article on a touchy subject.
23rd of Apr, 2007
I don t mind dating a man with kids. I think it s great. You can tell a lot about a man by how he treats his kids.
25th of Apr, 2007
Ok... Fala I was gonna tell you honestly that I have 130 kids... now that thats out of the way... can we date?...heeeeeeeeee.
25th of Apr, 2007
I am a single mother, so I would most definitely date a man with kids. However, I am not really looking for a father for my kids, or someone to help raise them, at least not at the moment. Maybe one day in the future.
25th of Apr, 2007
Wow, I know that would have to make dating even the more difficult (children).
25th of Apr, 2007
if you like somebody alot, it really shouldnt matter.
29th of Apr, 2007
Very true Fala....you can tell a lot about a person by how they treat children, the elderly, and pets. Not to get off topic.
Dating is hard enough, but I think the children need to be left out of it until the people involved are more sure of the seriousness of the relationship.
29th of Apr, 2007
It is ok if they 1 or 2 by the same person.
1st of May, 2007
That s a really good point Mossimo. No need to bring a parade of strangers past your kids if they re not going to be sticking around.
2nd of May, 2007
thats even tough to deal with soul.
4th of May, 2007
I agree with mossimo and fala...and sometimes you may even wonder if things are "going a bit too well" when you look forward to seeing thier Kid(s) and their pets just as much as your girlfriend...!!!!
6th of May, 2007
Its hard to date when you are a single mother... especially when, if you're anything like me, your picky about who watches your child. Since mine is only 4 1/2 months old, I dont go out at all. I refuse to stick my child with a babysitter, unless its my mom, and frankly I dont think I'm ready to jump back on that horse anytime soon anyway... LOL
6th of May, 2007
I think most of us would love to have a guy like our kids as much as they like us :)
7th of May, 2007
I have a child my self and life have to move on, even thou you have kids. But what is important when you are meeting someone that you have kids, alternavely seek a man/woman who want or have kids. To better your chances. t
8th of May, 2007
Very true justknowingu, good point!!
8th of May, 2007
Very true justknowingu, good point!!
9th of May, 2007
Wow. Things would have to be pretty far along for that to happen Just. Let s hope the kids and the pets look just as forward to seeing you too.
9th of May, 2007
I HAVE YET TO RUN INTO THIS KIND OF SITUATION.
11th of May, 2007
i hear you nicefella, i havent either.
11th of May, 2007
im sure you will one day nicefella.
12th of May, 2007
Thanks for the great article. Food for thought!!
16th of May, 2007
I wouldn't have a problem dating a man with kids as I have them myself.
16th of May, 2007
Having a son that is 18 it is hard to date a man with smaller children. Let's be real none of us want the other momma's drama and also the fact that he probably is paying half his salary to that baby's momma. I guess I never really understood the whole child support til he's broke concept but that's and entirely different subject.
3rd of Jun, 2007
Interesting thoughts Krockwyo
15th of Jul, 2007
as a man that has a low sperm count and can not get a girl pregnant i find it easy to date and jump into a relationship with someone that has already got kids as there is no expectations of being with someone that wants kids and you can not give them to her and i am always willing to except them as my own
15th of Jul, 2007
This is a touchy subject and a well written article. I'm a single dad and can relate to dating with children. My son doesn't meet just anyone. Actually, he's only met two ladies I've started a relationship with.
As stated by others, why should you parade your dates in front of your children if they aren't going to stick around? and/or do you really know if they want to stick around while doing so?
I don't have any issues with my son's mother, so I don't have near the problems other dads do. It is hard enough to just meet someone and get along much less introduce children into the mix. All parents know our children come first. I think it's a given that if the potential lady/man has no interest in your kid(s) then the relationship is probably at an end.
It is important when choosing a partner with children to be seriously committed and be honest to all involved including ones self.Too many people fail in relationships leaving the children alone and feeling abandoned. Do your absolute best in working out problems before turning tail to run. Nice article!